Cindy Adams

MARGARET Cho, who's been doing "Dancing With the Stars," is constantly rehearsing. "I keep training, working out and living on drinking lots of Red Bull. I'm determined to win. I'm starving. I lost 15 pounds. I'll eat everybody. Nothing is safe. No person. What I'd like in life is to be full of chocolate and eat three slices of pizza at every meal. We have a microwave on the bus, but I haven't yet explored it. I also dance on the bus. And everybody at the show's sick. It's biological warfare."

Bus? What bus?

"Stand-up comedy for 27 years is my trade. I'm doing a one-nighter Nov. 5 at the Beacon. I'm married since 2003, and we live in LA and Atlanta with two dogs, but the thing is -- home is actually the bus, which we park right outside the theater. I love New York but I can only stay there one day."

Being super-brilliant, I asked if lady comics aren't overly vulgar, and she said: "Yeah. And that's me. I use the F-word. I'm guilty of working dirty. We'd all like to be better, but we're battling stereotypes. I understand oppression, and talking is important for people like me who feel left out. I write my stuff myself. I wish I could find writers, but nobody can write for me. I'll do 90 minutes onstage with a little singing."

So, you want an F-ing good time? Catch Margaret at the Beacon with her New York jokes.